According to Jim

Cheryl and Jim get into an argument about Erik Estrada, and Jim sets out to prove her wrong about an incident involving the actor 10 years earlier.

On his birthday, Jim accuses Cheryl of habitually choosing gifts intended to change him instead of to please him.

Cheryl caters to Jim's every whim to make up for a fight he does not remember from the night before.

Dana puts her name on one of Cheryl's presents to Jim, then takes all the credit when he raves about it.

Cheryl gets stranded on the roof retrieving a tablecloth for Thanksgiving dinner, and no one notices her absence until she disables the television.

Jim uses Andy's gift certificate just before Andy remembers he has it and invites Jim to help him use it.

Jim tries to convince Cheryl that it was her idea to turn the basement into a media room instead of a room for Gracie and Ruby, blaming her forgetfulness on pregnancy.

With Cheryl on bed rest, Jim hosts Gracie's doll-themed party, turning the girly tea party into a wild squirt-gun fight.

Jim institutes a tribunal system to stop the children from bickering, and it works well for solving the children's problems but backfires when he and Andy have an argument.

The irritating Devlins bid on the house across the street from Jim and Cheryl.

Jim is haunted by a ghost when he buys Cheryl a diamond necklace that was taken off a dead woman.

In the last ever episode, Jim chokes on some food and finds himself on trial in heaven, where Andy represents the defense and Dana the Devil.

When Jim gets financially rewarded for doing charity work, Cheryl tells him that he should return the money.

Jim is frustrated that Kyle seems to like science-fiction better than sports, so he tries to change his son's opinion by going to a convention with him.

When Jim is prescribed pain pills for a back injury, the family takes advantage of his unusually mellow mood.

Jim tries to be a cool dad to impress Ruby and her friends but realizes that she is just manipulating him.

Despite Mandy's warnings, Andy plays snow football with Jim and gets injured.

Jim turns baby-sitting into a sporting event by staging baby races where the fathers bet on their kids.

Kyle and Andy both fall for Ruby's piano teacher, Mandy (Jackie Debatin).

Andy tries to find a perfect birthday present for his girlfriend (Jackie Debatin).

When Jim runs into an ex-girlfriend (Constance Marie), he becomes convinced she wants to rekindle their romance.

Jim joins Cheryl's yoga class after getting jealous of her male instructor.

Andy and Jim plan a retreat at Andy's fiancee's cabin in the woods.

Jim tries to earn money for Christmas gifts for his kids by landing the twins in a movie role opposite Steve Guttenberg.

Jim urges Andy to propose to Emily or risk losing her, but when he sees Emily dining with another man, he doubts the wisdom of his advice.

Jim's band wins a contest, providing the group an opportunity to play backup for child pop sensation Jami McFame.

Jim guilts the older kids into doing household chores after Jonathan's special blanket goes missing.

When Dana, Cheryl's sister and best friend, moves away, Jim realizes he must find Cheryl a new friend as soon as possible.

When Dana, Cheryl's sister and best friend, moves away, Jim realizes he must find Cheryl a new friend as soon as possible.

A chance meeting in the supermarket lets Jim in on Cheryl's secret: though she says the doctor told her to stay in bed, her doctor actually wants her to be active.

The devil (James Lipton) comes to collect on a deal Jim made with him back when Jim was courting Cheryl.

Pregnant Cheryl wants to have a game night and play a game that she never loses, but Dana knows she cheats.

Andy is sure Emily is going to break up with him, since all his former girlfriends left him after six weeks of dating; Dana hypnotizes Andy to find out the cause of his breakups.

After years of dating, Andy meets the perfect girl and worries that she will break up with him; Jim offers to take Andy's girlfriend's daughter to a concert with Ruby and Gracie.

Jim institutes a tribunal system to stop the children from bickering, and it works well for solving the children's problems but backfires when he and Andy have an argument.

Jim uses Andy's gift certificate just before Andy remembers he has it and invites Jim to help him use it.

Jim tries to convince Cheryl that it was her idea to turn the basement into a media room instead of a room for Gracie and Ruby, blaming her forgetfulness on pregnancy.

With Cheryl on bed rest, Jim hosts Gracie's doll-themed party, turning the girly tea party into a wild squirt-gun fight.

While Cheryl is still in Florida, Jim donates all of the kids' old furniture and clothes to charity to clear the garage for a cigar lounge; Cheryl calls Jim with a special announcement.

When Andy decides to learn how to dance for his sister's wedding, he turns to Jim -- a closet dancer -- for lessons.

Jim and Cheryl attempt to plan for some romantic time alone, but when the kids demand all of her attention, Jim plans to meet Cheryl for a tryst in the airport lounge.

Jim and Cheryl attempt to plan for some romantic time alone, but when the kids demand all of her attention, Jim plans to meet Cheryl for a tryst in the airport lounge.

Jim reads Ruby and Gracie's diaries to find out why they can't seem to stop fighting, and realizes that his daughters need some delicate motherly advice.

Jim reads Ruby and Gracie's diaries to find out why they can't seem to stop fighting, and realizes that his daughters need some delicate motherly advice.

Jim asks Dana for help while Cheryl is away; Jim and Dana follow Ruby on her date with an older boy.

Jim asks Dana for help while Cheryl is away; Jim and Dana follow Ruby on her date with an older boy.

Jim struggles to care for the kids and household while Cheryl is away, but several sympathetic neighborhood moms lend him a hand.

Cheryl and Jim's evening alone turns into an all-out food fight; Andy plots revenge on Jim for coaxing his children to play pranks on him.

Taking an interest in health and safety, Cheryl sets new rules that cause Jim to feel stifled.

God gives Jim the power to reinvent women; Andy asks God to make men more like women.

Jim tries to cheer up Cheryl by forging suggestive notes from the handsome water delivery man.

Jim tries to sabotage the surprise 50th birthday party Cheryl plans for him.

Jim finds Cheryl a gay friend that she can attend musicals with, so he can escape having to go himself.

When Tim and Cindy Devlin crash Gracie's birthday party, they announce that they are getting divorced.

Andy's attempt to sell a grill that Jim gave him a few years ago results in a wildly destructive tug-of-war between the two.

Jim develops a friendship with Dana's new boyfriend, despite the fact that the guy dumped Cheryl years ago.

Andy's new metal detector uncovers Jim's long lost wedding ring, causing a problem for Jim, who's been hiding the fact that he lost it for years.

The Ghost of Andy gives Jim a glimpse of Kyle's future as a loser because of Jim's failed attempts to help his son during a softball game.

Coach Jim turns his daughters' noncompetitive basketball team into tough, aggressive winners.

Jim does not tell Cheryl that their health insurance has been canceled after he has an argument with a claims representative.

Dana and baby Tanner stay with Jim and Cheryl for a night, but the baby's crying makes it impossible for Jim to sleep.

Jim is unable to transport the girls' papier-mache grizzly bear to school because he lost his truck in an arm-wrestling match and refuses to ask for it back.

Dana and Cheryl hesitantly entrust Ryan and Jim to watch the kids and baby Tanner while they have a girls night out.

While Dana is in premature labor, Ryan is in a war-torn country, delivering a celebrity's baby.

Jim, Ryan and Andy learn that Cheryl and Dana have appeared in a ``Chicks Gone Wild`` video.

Raging Jim accidentally backs into a police car while chasing a guy and chooses anger-management classes instead of paying the fine.

Jim takes over housekeeping duties to give Cheryl time to grieve when her favorite uncle dies, but begins to suspect Cheryl is faking her grief to get him to do more housework.

Jim must pay for an expensive operation to keep the family's pet guinea pig alive.

Jim and Cheryl try to celebrate their 15th anniversary in an Indiana motel but must drive back to Chicago when Dana thinks she is in labor.

As a talk-show guest, Jim angers Cheryl by expressing the view that men should not let women feminize them.

Jim teaches Kyle to throw the perfect punch to defend himself against the school bully, but Kyle gets suspended for repeatedly hitting the other child.

Jim advises Ryan (Mitch Rouse) on how to deal with fluctuating hormones when he announces that Dana is expecting.

Jim advises Ryan (Mitch Rouse) on how to deal with fluctuating hormones when he announces that Dana is expecting.

Andy starts to play chess with Ryan on a regular basis, and jealous Jim assumes Andy is no longer his best friend.

Andy starts to play chess with Ryan on a regular basis, and jealous Jim assumes Andy is no longer his best friend.

Cheryl urges Jim to behave on St. Patrick's Day and forgo his annual law-bending ``Green Man`` routine so she can assure herself an appointment to the church committee.

Jim suspects that the father (Joseph Bologna) of one of Ruby and Gracie's classmates is his own real father, who abandoned him as a child.

Jim suspects that the father (Joseph Bologna) of one of Ruby and Gracie's classmates is his own real father, who abandoned him as a child.

After Jim makes a neighbor cry with a blunt remark at his backyard barbecue, Jim decides to reform and become the model of polite diplomacy.

After Jim makes a neighbor cry with a blunt remark at his backyard barbecue, Jim decides to reform and become the model of polite diplomacy.

Jim learns that his neighbor (Julie Newmar) has written a series of children's books, modeling a grumpy old man on him.

Jim learns that his neighbor (Julie Newmar) has written a series of children's books, modeling a grumpy old man on him.

Cheryl thinks she is attending a lingerie party given by Andy's new girlfriend, then learns the hostess is selling sex toys.

Cheryl thinks she is attending a lingerie party given by Andy's new girlfriend, then learns the hostess is selling sex toys.

Cheryl and Jim get into an argument about Erik Estrada, and Jim sets out to prove her wrong about an incident involving the actor 10 years earlier.

On his birthday, Jim accuses Cheryl of habitually choosing gifts intended to change him instead of to please him.

During a ceremony to renew their wedding vows, Jim and Cheryl squabble because she allowed Gracie and Ruby to get their ears pierced.

During a ceremony to renew their wedding vows, Jim and Cheryl squabble because she allowed Gracie and Ruby to get their ears pierced.

When Jim and Cheryl preview a sex education video to be shown to children at Ruby's school, they discover that the boy in the video is Jim.

When Jim and Cheryl preview a sex education video to be shown to children at Ruby's school, they discover that the boy in the video is Jim.

When Cheryl and Dana's mother, Maggie, visits for the holidays, Jim and Cheryl compete with Ryan and Dana for her affection.

Cheryl urges Jim to meet an old girlfriend (Linda Hamilton) for lunch, but has second thoughts when she becomes convinced the woman has romantic intentions.

Cheryl urges Jim to meet an old girlfriend (Linda Hamilton) for lunch, but has second thoughts when she becomes convinced the woman has romantic intentions.

To teach Jim the value of communication, Cheryl does not speak to him for three days.

Jim helps Andy pick up a beautiful woman at the bar, but she turns out to be crazy.

In an effort to outdo Cheryl's story about meeting Oprah, Jim makes up a story about his construction office catching fire.

Jim tries to teach Kyle a lesson about quitting by running a 10k marathon, but he ends up cheating in the race.

When Cheryl wins two tickets to visit Hugh Hefner at the Playboy Mansion, she decides to take Dana instead of Jim.

Jim fears that Cheryl's romantic expectations will increase as Ryan (Mitch Rouse) showers Dana with gifts, until he learns a secret about a special tape Cheryl may have made.

Jim fears that Cheryl's romantic expectations will increase as Ryan (Mitch Rouse) showers Dana with gifts, until he learns a secret about a special tape Cheryl may have made.

Despite Cheryl's reservations, Jim gets Kyle out of his first day of kindergarten to go see a Cubs game.

Jim scrambles to find a replacement when he accidentally knocks the minister unconscious with the car door on Dana's wedding day.

Dana and Cheryl worry when their respective partners Andy and Jim decide to take up some dangerous adrenaline sports.

Jim and Cheryl's botched anniversary moments from years past.

When Cheryl's respectable bachelorette party disappoints Dana, Jim and Andy treat Dana to a rowdy night she will never forget.

Confident Jim is crushed when he loses a hot-dog-eating contest to a petite woman, and Andy compounds Jim's sorrow by deciding to date the winner.

Jim and Cheryl adjust the clocks to get the kids to bed earlier so they can have more quality time together.

Jim is shocked to learn that his recently deceased friend will be buried with a rare baseball card he stole from Jim.

Jim is dismayed when he has to drive Gracie to spelling bee tournaments all over the state.

In order to avoid going to an opera with Cheryl, Jim asks an elderly widower to be her escort.

When Andy decides to learn how to dance for his sister's wedding, he turns to Jim -- a closet dancer -- for lessons.

An attractive woman's suggestion leads Jim to grow a mustache, much to the dismay of Cheryl, who retaliates by coloring her hair.

Cheryl offers to let Dana wear her wedding dress, unaware that the gown was destroyed in a fiery sports celebration years earlier.

When Cheryl cooks for Dana and her boyfriend, she lets him believe that Dana actually did the cooking.

To make Cheryl feel desirable, Jim fakes a jealous rage in a restaurant and tries to teach Dana's date to do the same, but the lesson backfires when Dana fears her new beau is paranoid and possessive.

Cheryl claims to like men who aren't afraid to cry, but when Jim bursts into tears after a movie, she is surprised to find herself turned off by his sensitivity.

Jim buys a nanny-cam to spy on the sitter he did not want to hire but learns something about Cheryl instead, prompting her to buy a camera of her own.

To make Cheryl feel desirable, Jim fakes a jealous rage in a restaurant and tries to teach Dana's date to do the same, but the lesson backfires when Dana fears her new beau is paranoid and possessive.

Jim buys a nanny-cam to spy on the sitter he did not want to hire but learns something about Cheryl instead, prompting her to buy a camera of her own.

Cheryl's doctor puts sex off-limits until the time is right for conception; Jim eats crow to win a huge account from a blowhard potential client (Tom Arnold).

Jim, a superstitious sports fan, comes to believe that his former neighbors, the Devlins, bring good luck to the Bulls.

When Jim gets into an accident with a department store Santa, an altercation ensues that leaves his on-looking kids fearing Santa will not bring them any gifts.

Jim becomes the prey of a 40-pound psychotic turkey named Angry Pete during a Thanksgiving hunt with Andy.

When Tim and Cindy Devlin crash Gracie's birthday party, they announce that they are getting divorced.

Cheryl's doctor puts sex off-limits until the time is right for conception; Jim eats crow to win a huge account from a blowhard potential client (Tom Arnold).

Jim becomes the prey of a 40-pound psychotic turkey named Angry Pete during a Thanksgiving hunt with Andy.

Cheryl's mother has plans for the afterlife that would put everyone in a large family plot she reserved years ago, but Jim insists on his own family plot, conveniently located next to that of a star football player.

Jim is hurt when Ruby invites Andy to the father-daughter dance instead of him.

Jim is concerned that Kyle is going to grow up to be effeminate when he insists on wearing a Cinderella costume for Halloween.

Jim does not tell Cheryl that their health insurance has been canceled after he has an argument with a claims representative.

Cheryl and Dana are forced to smash their way out of a locked garage because they ignored Jim's lesson on how to open the door from the inside.

Jim offers to give Andy an old barbecue grill, then decides Andy should pay for it.

Cheryl surprises Jim with a romantic evening, but it cuts into his planned TV boxing match.

Cheryl wants Jim to give up all his vices so they can try to have a baby.

Jim, Ryan and Andy learn that Cheryl and Dana have appeared in a ``Chicks Gone Wild`` video.

Jim chickens out of having a vasectomy, but Cheryl is so effusive in her praise that he is unable to admit that he did not go through with it.

Cheryl protests when a heat wave sends the family sneaking into a vacationing neighbor's pool - until she starts sneaking over on her own.

Jim develops a friendship with Dana's new boyfriend, despite the fact that the guy dumped Cheryl years ago.

Jim agrees to go to a couples seminar, hoping Cheryl will reciprocate by letting him go on a fishing trip with Andy.

Cheryl asks Jim to put the kids' artwork in storage, but he disposes of it elsewhere, thinking Cheryl will not notice.

When Cheryl decides to remodel the bathroom, Jim insists that it include a stainless-steel toilet that talks.

Jim is unable to transport the girls' papier-mache grizzly bear to school because he lost his truck in an arm-wrestling match and refuses to ask for it back.

Andy resents a wealthy client (Nana Visitor), then ends up dating her.

Jim's sister (Jennifer Coolidge) shows up on his doorstep -- pregnant.

Gracie's recent misbehavior makes Jim think she is lying about a friend giving her a new video game.

Dana's boss replaces Jim with a handsome actor (Ingo Rademacher) in a commercial starring Cheryl and the children.

Jim takes umbrage at being replaced as the father in a promotional shoot for a cruise line. Ingo Rademacher guest stars.

Dana's boss replaces Jim with a handsome actor (Ingo Rademacher) in a commercial starring Cheryl and the children.

Cheryl brags to her cousin that she is the lead singer in Jim's band.

Jim tries to convince his friend Danny (Dan Aykroyd) not to back out on his wedding plans with Laraine (Laraine Newman).

Dana falls for the Rev. Pierson (guest star Chris Elliott) after he sets her up with a promising job lead.

The irritating Devlins bid on the house across the street from Jim and Cheryl.

Dana puts her name on one of Cheryl's presents to Jim, then takes all the credit when he raves about it.

Cheryl caters to Jim's every whim to make up for a fight he does not remember from the night before.

Cheryl gets stranded on the roof retrieving a tablecloth for Thanksgiving dinner, and no one notices her absence until she disables the television.

After Cheryl's cooking class choice proves to be a disaster, Jim gets to pick paintball as the next couple's activity.

Jim invents an imaginary friend to avoid going to a couple's baby shower with Cheryl.

Gracie and Ruby have nightmares after Jim takes them to a scary movie.

Dana falls for a guy exactly like Jim but denies the similarities.

Jim tells Ruby's teacher that his wife is illiterate in order to lighten his daughter's homework load.

Jim encourages Gracie and Ruby to open a lemonade stand but does not anticipate fierce competition from a neighbor kid's stand.

When Cheryl's friend gets expensive jewelry from her husband as gifts for no reason, Cheryl expects Jim to do the same; Jim finds these to be unreasonable requests and doubts the husband's intentions.

Jim feels guilty after cheating at a church's fund-raising bingo game.

Jim panics when his son becomes a Green Bay Packers fan, and he tries to convert him to a Chicago Bears fan.

Jim starts to resent being Cheryl's errand boy; Andy thinks flashing his wedding ring around will make him a ``chick magnet.``.

Cheryl secretly plans a reunion between Jim and his estranged sister (Jennifer Coolidge) when the family takes a trip to Las Vegas.

Cheryl secretly plans a reunion between Jim and his estranged sister (Jennifer Coolidge) when the family takes a trip to Las Vegas.

Cheryl's recently widowed mother (guest star Kathleen Noone) introduces her fiance to the family, drawing disapproval of the whirlwind romance.

Dana pretends to be Ruby's mother to attract the attention of a single father she met in the park.

The household is annoyed when Gracie adopts an abandoned bird.

An online bidding war reveals to Cheryl that Jim is spending money on memorabilia instead of a new dryer.

Jim must decide between helping Cheryl through surgery or meeting his hero, Bo Diddley.

Jim and Cheryl's new friends turn out to be obnoxious, but they benefit from the relationship.

Jim does more harm than good when he stands up to Dana's boss; Andy has trouble making arrangements for his birthday party.

A successful guy that Jim went to high school with gives him a big contracting job and makes a pass at Cheryl over dinner.

Jim goes into protective overdrive after Cheryl is mugged while shopping.

Jim worries Cheryl will learn the truth about her engagement ring after she invites his old girlfriend (Crystal Bernard) to dinner.

When Cheryl gets sick, and Jim is forced to entertain a gaggle of little girls at Ruby's slumber party.

Cheryl disapproves of Jim's latest invention, a flatulent doll named Gassy Gus. Andrea Walters, Ben Falcone, Andre Ware and Philip Daniel Bolden guest star.

Cheryl and Jim's memories of their first meeting conflict when they try to play matchmaker to a cop and his partner (Dan Aykroyd, Laraine Newman).

Cheryl and Jim's memories of their first meeting conflict when they try to play matchmaker to a cop and his partner (Dan Aykroyd, Laraine Newman).

Jim takes Cheryl on a romantic weekend with money he knows was mistakenly credited to his card.

Dana's new boyfriend (guest star Brad Paisley) is an amazing musician who can get Jim the gig of his dreams -- once Andy is out of the way.

A neighbor invites the whole family to a Christmas party except Jim, who has been feuding with the host.

Jim and Cheryl are caught making whoopee on the set of the school's Thanksgiving play. Julia Sweeney guest stars.

Jim's new pastor harbors a grudge against him over a childhood game of dodgeball. Chris Elliott guest stars.

Jim advises Dana not to be herself when she's picked for the TV reality series, ``The Bachelor.``

Jim's behavior at a Bears game is a bad influence on the children, but Cheryl sets a bad example too.

Jim wants his own space because Cheryl's stuff is taking over the house.

Jim's pizza delivery boy moves in with him and Cheryl after the boy's father kicks him out of the house because of his dream of doing standup comedy.

Cheryl and Jim cannot tear themselves away from the baby monitor when they overhear the neighbors engaging in pillow talk.

When Cheryl helps Dana buy a new car that turns out to be a lemon, Jim is determined to straighten things out at the dealership.

Cheryl hides the digital camera after Jim deliberately deletes a photograph she urged him to save.

After finding out about the surprise party Jim was planning for her, Cheryl tries to throw a surprise party for him, but he's too busy to show up because he's bowling with Chicago Bears football star Brian Urlacher.

Jim misplaces the children while out with Andy; Cheryl decides to enjoy the day by going to a movie with Dana.

When an old friend (guest star Dan Aykroyd) comes to town, Jim tries to relive his rowdy partying days.

Cheryl chastises Jim for losing the receipt needed to return a defective DVD player -- until she realizes she lost it, not him.

After learning that Dana earns more money than he does, Jim feels he needs to prove his worth to the children, so he buys them an expensive gift.

A night on the town turns into a disaster for Cheryl and Jim; Dana cajoles Andy into doing her delinquent taxes.

Cheryl tries to create a relaxed, low-pressure environment for Jim after he develops high blood pressure.

After Jim says he once let Cheryl beat him at racquetball to win her affection, she challenges him to a showdown.

Cheryl gives Jim a revealing photo of herself as a Valentine gift, and he proudly shows it off to his friends.

Cheryl goes behind Jim's back and lends money to Andy for a down payment on a new condominium.

Jim has big plans for Ruby when she is hired for a cookies advertisement.

Jim blurts out profanity while watching a Bears game, and it's repeated by the girls and their little friend.

Cheryl is hurt when her visiting mother gives Dana a family heirloom for Christmas; Ruby and Gracie think Andy is Santa.

Andy announces he is becoming a vegetarian like his new girlfriend; Dana becomes frustrated with her dream date.

Jim is obsessed with bowling while Cheryl and their guests impatiently wait to start Thanksgiving dinner.

Andy asks Dana to join him in his therapy; broken promises are revealed.

Jim and Andy make the decision to fix Cheryl up with a stranger who she subsequently develops a crush on.

On Halloween, Jim sneaks out Gracie for trick-or-treating; Andy thinks a former girlfriend is stalking him.

Cheryl discovers that her sister is the true source of the anniversary gifts Jim gives to her every year.

When Cheryl's cat dies, Jim promises to give it a proper burial, but the football game takes priority.

Cheryl convinces Jim to abstain from sex until their big getaway; Jim and Andy argue about a treehouse.

When Jim tries to solve Ruby's separation anxiety, he discovers that he doesn't have the willpower to leave his teary 6-year-old at school.

Jim struggles to care for the kids and household while Cheryl is away, but several sympathetic neighborhood moms lend him a hand.

Cheryl and Jim's evening alone turns into an all-out food fight; Andy plots revenge on Jim for coaxing his children to play pranks on him.

Taking an interest in health and safety, Cheryl sets new rules that cause Jim to feel stifled.

Jim tries to cheer up Cheryl by forging suggestive notes from the handsome water delivery man.

God gives Jim the power to reinvent women; Andy asks God to make men more like women.

Jim tries to sabotage the surprise 50th birthday party Cheryl plans for him.

Jim finds Cheryl a gay friend that she can attend musicals with, so he can escape having to go himself.

Dana and baby Tanner stay with Jim and Cheryl for a night, but the baby's crying makes it impossible for Jim to sleep.

Dana and Cheryl hesitantly entrust Ryan and Jim to watch the kids and baby Tanner while they have a girls night out.

While Dana is in premature labor, Ryan is in a war-torn country, delivering a celebrity's baby.

Raging Jim accidentally backs into a police car while chasing a guy and chooses anger-management classes instead of paying the fine.

Jim takes over housekeeping duties to give Cheryl time to grieve when her favorite uncle dies, but begins to suspect Cheryl is faking her grief to get him to do more housework.

Jim and Cheryl try to celebrate their 15th anniversary in an Indiana motel but must drive back to Chicago when Dana thinks she is in labor.

Jim must pay for an expensive operation to keep the family's pet guinea pig alive.

As a talk-show guest, Jim angers Cheryl by expressing the view that men should not let women feminize them.

Jim teaches Kyle to throw the perfect punch to defend himself against the school bully, but Kyle gets suspended for repeatedly hitting the other child.

Cheryl brags to her cousin that she is the lead singer in Jim's band.

Dana falls for the Rev. Pierson (guest star Chris Elliott) after he sets her up with a promising job lead.

Gracie's recent misbehavior makes Jim think she is lying about a friend giving her a new video game.

Jim's sister (Jennifer Coolidge) shows up on his doorstep -- pregnant.

Jim tries to convince his friend Danny (Dan Aykroyd) not to back out on his wedding plans with Laraine (Laraine Newman).

Jim agrees to go to a couples seminar, hoping Cheryl will reciprocate by letting him go on a fishing trip with Andy.

When Cheryl decides to remodel the bathroom, Jim insists that it include a stainless-steel toilet that talks.

Cheryl asks Jim to put the kids' artwork in storage, but he disposes of it elsewhere, thinking Cheryl will not notice.

Jim takes umbrage at being replaced as the father in a promotional shoot for a cruise line. Ingo Rademacher guest stars.

Andy resents a wealthy client (Nana Visitor), then ends up dating her.

Cheryl claims to like men who aren't afraid to cry, but when Jim bursts into tears after a movie, she is surprised to find herself turned off by his sensitivity.

Cheryl wants Jim to give up all his vices so they can try to have a baby.

Jim chickens out of having a vasectomy, but Cheryl is so effusive in her praise that he is unable to admit that he did not go through with it.

Coach Jim turns his daughters' noncompetitive basketball team into tough, aggressive winners.

Jim is concerned that Kyle is going to grow up to be effeminate when he insists on wearing a Cinderella costume for Halloween.

Jim is hurt when Ruby invites Andy to the father-daughter dance instead of him.

Cheryl's mother has plans for the afterlife that would put everyone in a large family plot she reserved years ago, but Jim insists on his own family plot, conveniently located next to that of a star football player.

When Jim gets into an accident with a department store Santa, an altercation ensues that leaves his on-looking kids fearing Santa will not bring them any gifts.

Jim, a superstitious sports fan, comes to believe that his former neighbors, the Devlins, bring good luck to the Bulls.

The Ghost of Andy gives Jim a glimpse of Kyle's future as a loser because of Jim's failed attempts to help his son during a softball game.

Cheryl surprises Jim with a romantic evening, but it cuts into his planned TV boxing match.

Cheryl and Dana are forced to smash their way out of a locked garage because they ignored Jim's lesson on how to open the door from the inside.

Jim offers to give Andy an old barbecue grill, then decides Andy should pay for it.

Andy's attempt to sell a grill that Jim gave him a few years ago results in a wildly destructive tug-of-war between the two.

Cheryl protests when a heat wave sends the family sneaking into a vacationing neighbor's pool - until she starts sneaking over on her own.

Andy's new metal detector uncovers Jim's long lost wedding ring, causing a problem for Jim, who's been hiding the fact that he lost it for years.

While Cheryl is still in Florida, Jim donates all of the kids' old furniture and clothes to charity to clear the garage for a cigar lounge; Cheryl calls Jim with a special announcement.

When Cheryl cooks for Dana and her boyfriend, she lets him believe that Dana actually did the cooking.

Jim is shocked to learn that his recently deceased friend will be buried with a rare baseball card he stole from Jim.

Jim is dismayed when he has to drive Gracie to spelling bee tournaments all over the state.

In order to avoid going to an opera with Cheryl, Jim asks an elderly widower to be her escort.

An attractive woman's suggestion leads Jim to grow a mustache, much to the dismay of Cheryl, who retaliates by coloring her hair.

Cheryl offers to let Dana wear her wedding dress, unaware that the gown was destroyed in a fiery sports celebration years earlier.

To teach Jim the value of communication, Cheryl does not speak to him for three days.

Dana pretends to be Ruby's mother to attract the attention of a single father she met in the park.

Jim must decide between helping Cheryl through surgery or meeting his hero, Bo Diddley.

Jim does more harm than good when he stands up to Dana's boss; Andy has trouble making arrangements for his birthday party.

Jim and Cheryl's new friends turn out to be obnoxious, but they benefit from the relationship.

Cheryl's recently widowed mother (guest star Kathleen Noone) introduces her fiance to the family, drawing disapproval of the whirlwind romance.

The household is annoyed when Gracie adopts an abandoned bird.

When Cheryl gets sick, and Jim is forced to entertain a gaggle of little girls at Ruby's slumber party.

Jim starts to resent being Cheryl's errand boy; Andy thinks flashing his wedding ring around will make him a ``chick magnet.``.

An online bidding war reveals to Cheryl that Jim is spending money on memorabilia instead of a new dryer.

Jim panics when his son becomes a Green Bay Packers fan, and he tries to convert him to a Chicago Bears fan.

A successful guy that Jim went to high school with gives him a big contracting job and makes a pass at Cheryl over dinner.

Jim worries Cheryl will learn the truth about her engagement ring after she invites his old girlfriend (Crystal Bernard) to dinner.

Cheryl disapproves of Jim's latest invention, a flatulent doll named Gassy Gus. Andrea Walters, Ben Falcone, Andre Ware and Philip Daniel Bolden guest star.

Cheryl secretly plans a reunion between Jim and his estranged sister (Jennifer Coolidge) when the family takes a trip to Las Vegas.

Cheryl secretly plans a reunion between Jim and his estranged sister (Jennifer Coolidge) when the family takes a trip to Las Vegas.

Jim goes into protective overdrive after Cheryl is mugged while shopping.

Jim tells Ruby's teacher that his wife is illiterate in order to lighten his daughter's homework load.

Dana falls for a guy exactly like Jim but denies the similarities.

When Cheryl's friend gets expensive jewelry from her husband as gifts for no reason, Cheryl expects Jim to do the same; Jim finds these to be unreasonable requests and doubts the husband's intentions.

After Cheryl's cooking class choice proves to be a disaster, Jim gets to pick paintball as the next couple's activity.

Gracie and Ruby have nightmares after Jim takes them to a scary movie.

Jim invents an imaginary friend to avoid going to a couple's baby shower with Cheryl.

Jim encourages Gracie and Ruby to open a lemonade stand but does not anticipate fierce competition from a neighbor kid's stand.

Jim feels guilty after cheating at a church's fund-raising bingo game.

Dana and Cheryl worry when their respective partners Andy and Jim decide to take up some dangerous adrenaline sports.

When Cheryl's respectable bachelorette party disappoints Dana, Jim and Andy treat Dana to a rowdy night she will never forget.

Jim and Cheryl adjust the clocks to get the kids to bed earlier so they can have more quality time together.

Confident Jim is crushed when he loses a hot-dog-eating contest to a petite woman, and Andy compounds Jim's sorrow by deciding to date the winner.

Jim and Cheryl's botched anniversary moments from years past.

Jim scrambles to find a replacement when he accidentally knocks the minister unconscious with the car door on Dana's wedding day.

Despite Cheryl's reservations, Jim gets Kyle out of his first day of kindergarten to go see a Cubs game.

Jim fears that Cheryl's romantic expectations will increase as Ryan (Mitch Rouse) showers Dana with gifts, until he learns a secret about a special tape Cheryl may have made.

After years of dating, Andy meets the perfect girl and worries that she will break up with him; Jim offers to take Andy's girlfriend's daughter to a concert with Ruby and Gracie.

Andy is sure Emily is going to break up with him, since all his former girlfriends left him after six weeks of dating; Dana hypnotizes Andy to find out the cause of his breakups.

When Cheryl wins two tickets to visit Hugh Hefner at the Playboy Mansion, she decides to take Dana instead of Jim.

Jim fears that Cheryl's romantic expectations will increase as Ryan (Mitch Rouse) showers Dana with gifts, until he learns a secret about a special tape Cheryl may have made.

In an effort to outdo Cheryl's story about meeting Oprah, Jim makes up a story about his construction office catching fire.

Jim tries to teach Kyle a lesson about quitting by running a 10k marathon, but he ends up cheating in the race.

A chance meeting in the supermarket lets Jim in on Cheryl's secret: though she says the doctor told her to stay in bed, her doctor actually wants her to be active.

Jim guilts the older kids into doing household chores after Jonathan's special blanket goes missing.

Pregnant Cheryl wants to have a game night and play a game that she never loses, but Dana knows she cheats.

The devil (James Lipton) comes to collect on a deal Jim made with him back when Jim was courting Cheryl.

Jim helps Andy pick up a beautiful woman at the bar, but she turns out to be crazy.

When Cheryl and Dana's mother, Maggie, visits for the holidays, Jim and Cheryl compete with Ryan and Dana for her affection.

Cheryl urges Jim to behave on St. Patrick's Day and forgo his annual law-bending "Green Man" routine so she can assure herself an appointment to the church committee.

Jim urges Andy to propose to Emily or risk losing her, but when he sees Emily dining with another man, he doubts the wisdom of his advice.

Jim's band wins a contest, providing the group an opportunity to play backup for child pop sensation Jami McFame.

Jim tries to earn money for Christmas gifts for his kids by landing the twins in a movie role opposite Steve Guttenberg.

Andy and Jim plan a retreat at Andy's fiancée's cabin in the woods.

When Jim runs into an ex-girlfriend (Constance Marie), he becomes convinced she wants to rekindle their romance.

Kyle and Andy both fall for Ruby's piano teacher, Mandy (Jackie Debatin).

Andy tries to find a perfect birthday present for his girlfriend (Jackie Debatin).

Jim joins Cheryl's yoga class after getting jealous of her male instructor.

When Jim is prescribed pain pills for a back injury, the family takes advantage of his unusually mellow mood.

Jim is frustrated that Kyle seems to like science-fiction better than sports, so he tries to change his son's opinion by going to a convention with him.

Despite Mandy's warnings, Andy plays snow football with Jim and gets injured.

Jim tries to be a cool dad to impress Ruby and her friends but realizes that she is just manipulating him.

Jim turns baby-sitting into a sporting event by staging baby races where the fathers bet on their kids.

In the last ever episode, Jim chokes on some food and finds himself on trial in heaven, where Andy represents the defense and Dana the Devil.

Cheryl and Jim's memories of their first meeting conflict when they try to play matchmaker to a cop and his partner (Dan Aykroyd, Laraine Newman).

Cheryl and Jim's memories of their first meeting conflict when they try to play matchmaker to a cop and his partner (Dan Aykroyd, Laraine Newman).

When Jim gets financially rewarded for doing charity work, Cheryl tells him that he should return the money.

When Jim tries to solve Ruby's separation anxiety, he discovers that he doesn't have the willpower to leave his teary 6-year-old at school.

Cheryl convinces Jim to abstain from sex until their big getaway; Jim and Andy argue about a treehouse.

When Cheryl's cat dies, Jim promises to give it a proper burial, but the football game takes priority.

Cheryl discovers that her sister is the true source of the anniversary gifts Jim gives to her every year.

Jim and Andy make the decision to fix Cheryl up with a stranger who she subsequently develops a crush on.

Jim is haunted by a ghost when he buys Cheryl a diamond necklace that was taken off a dead woman.

Andy asks Dana to join him in his therapy; broken promises are revealed.

On Halloween, Jim sneaks out Gracie for trick-or-treating; Andy thinks a former girlfriend is stalking him.

Jim blurts out profanity while watching a Bears game, and it's repeated by the girls and their little friend.

Jim has big plans for Ruby when she is hired for a cookies advertisement.

Cheryl goes behind Jim's back and lends money to Andy for a down payment on a new condominium.

Jim is obsessed with bowling while Cheryl and their guests impatiently wait to start Thanksgiving dinner.

Cheryl is hurt when her visiting mother gives Dana a family heirloom for Christmas; Ruby and Gracie think Andy is Santa.

Andy announces he is becoming a vegetarian like his new girlfriend; Dana becomes frustrated with her dream date.

Cheryl gives Jim a revealing photo of herself as a Valentine gift, and he proudly shows it off to his friends.

After learning that Dana earns more money than he does, Jim feels he needs to prove his worth to the children, so he buys them an expensive gift.

A night on the town turns into a disaster for Cheryl and Jim; Dana cajoles Andy into doing her delinquent taxes.

After Jim says he once let Cheryl beat him at racquetball to win her affection, she challenges him to a showdown.

Cheryl tries to create a relaxed, low-pressure environment for Jim after he develops high blood pressure.

Cheryl chastises Jim for losing the receipt needed to return a defective DVD player -- until she realizes she lost it, not him.

When an old friend (guest star Dan Aykroyd) comes to town, Jim tries to relive his rowdy partying days.

Jim misplaces the children while out with Andy; Cheryl decides to enjoy the day by going to a movie with Dana.

After finding out about the surprise party Jim was planning for her, Cheryl tries to throw a surprise party for him, but he's too busy to show up because he's bowling with Chicago Bears football star Brian Urlacher.

When Cheryl helps Dana buy a new car that turns out to be a lemon, Jim is determined to straighten things out at the dealership.

Cheryl hides the digital camera after Jim deliberately deletes a photograph she urged him to save.

Cheryl and Jim cannot tear themselves away from the baby monitor when they overhear the neighbors engaging in pillow talk.

Jim's pizza delivery boy moves in with him and Cheryl after the boy's father kicks him out of the house because of his dream of doing standup comedy.